Friday, 19 September 2008

Strange Events

Okay, it has taken me an eternity to update. Even me I know. I’m beginning to join the ranks of Sasuke, Aloofar, Mz. Dee and fineboy Agbero. Just to mention a few.
Yepa! A don die finish.

Make a no pass fo Ojuelegba again, or else fineboy Agbero go tell im boys make dem deal wit me. A must also cancel dat trip to Porakot. A sure say Mz. Dee sabi plenty militant boys wey go kidnap me laik say a be oil company expatriate.

As for that Aloofar a sure say na one ajebota (softie) I will deal with him personally. Apart from that, I have a score to settle with Aloofar, over Vera.

Unless Sasuke has updadted recently or he updates in the next Twenty-four hours, I think Aunty SSD, headmistress, should organise a search party to go look for am O! I hia say dem dey find pesin do sacrifice make Megida do flenti, flenti bafday for this world.

Strange things have been happening to me lately.

Okay, I got home one day last week and I was feeling really hungry so I grabbed a cereal bowl, equivalent of garri bowl in Nigeria, grabbed a packet of weetabix, which I poured into the bowl and added milk. I enjoyed the meal so much I went for a second helping, which I also enjoyed. I wanted to go for round three. (No, not that kind of round. Remember I was talking about weetabix, your dirty mind.) Anyway, as I was about to return the packet of weetabix my eyes caught something on the packet that made me freeze with fear! The weetabix I had just taken had expired since February 2008!!! WTF??? No wonder it had a funny taste, which I though was a new flavour that the manufacturers had just added.


Walahi, Bumight, if I die my ghost will haunt you unless you take care of Vera for me. Then I won’t haunt you.

Something else happened to me, which I considered really strange.

I had a mobile phone (you call it cell phone in the US) last year and I downloaded this song as my ringtone, ‘Nasty girl’ by, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, Sean Combs, Sean "Puffy" Combs (I tire for the bobo self) feat. a whole bunch of losers in the Hip Hop world.

One day, last year, I was at my friend’s place, let call him ‘T’, and I heard his phone ring but reached for my phone thinking it was my phone ringing because the ringtone was exactly the same. We made a joke over who was copying who in downloading that particular ringtone.

I have since acquired another phone. (For those of you in Nigeria, the UK government gives out a brand new phone to all UK residents every year).

Anyway, I got another phone, courtesy of the UK government, and my new ringtone is ‘In my heart’ by Moby. Not a very popular song but there’s something about the song that I like.

I was back at my friend, ‘T’s place last Sunday and a phone rang. I reached for my phone thinking it was mine because it was the same ringtone. Alas, it wasn’t my phone ringing it was T’s wife’s phone. She had unknowingly downloaded the same ringtone as mine just like her husband did about a year ago. Spooky, innit?

Have you ever had any strange experience like that before? Let’s hear about it please.

*Just joking about the UK government giving out phones to UK residents every year O! *


Femi B said...

I never get ecxited about being first im going to force mysefl....yippeee im first
I think you'd be fine on the weetabix thingy, im sure everyone eaten expired food once in a while
According to strange events..i broke a bone in a ankle twice on the same day but 2 years apart. Right ankle 1996 and left ankle 1998 all on June 11...strange aint it?

bumight said...

you won't die, lol. Expired food like cereal is still good for 6 months after the expiry date.

wairraminute, u said Feb 2008, add 6 months, and that's August. we're in september, I guess you could still die, lmao!

ok, in that case, I'll take care of vera for u :)

Buttercup said...

hewooooooo! wow, hope u drank lots of water afterwards to flush it out???

the ringtone thing..what a coincidence..

um strange thing..lemme see..a while ago i got the equivalent of N20grand in my account..i was jejely checkin my balance at the atm when i found out, ha! i checked like 5 more times to be sure, then i just went home in a trance..i was told by some peeps to chill a lil before attemptin to spend, i chilled ooooo, but it was still in my account..its only my parents that have my account details n they wuda told me if the sent anythin..i found it really strange but took it as a blessin..haha!

Smaragd said...

lol @ Bumight's comment! so what sort of coffin would u like Naijaleta eh?

u are not serious o! i actually believed the UK government gist! dumdum me, mchew!

cant think of any strange things right now jare.

Sting said...

What is weetabix? Never heard of it.Pple in the UK get new cell phones every year or u r kidding?

Rita said...

Did they write Best Before or Expiry Date on the Weetabix? If it was best before, it means the weetabix is no longer best but good after Feb 2008:-) If it was expiry comment...

this ringing tone coincidence...has happened a lot to me...I have even found out who someone was dating becos of the coincidence...

AlooFar said...


When did Vera become an item on a bazaar tray?

Mz. Dee said...

Aloofar even has the audacity to show his face here...... hiss.

Mhmm.. so ure not dead yet?? Kai.. and i was already plannin that as my xcuse to come n visit ur corpse..:p
u know i cant lose u.. cant cant cant!

Strange thingz... um.

u? :p

Standtall said...

Sasuke is still too drunk to update again I think

Bumight is now finally Bumight and not Bumtight

isha said...

Weetabix is good for a long time. You'll be good.
How body?

badderchic said...

I reckon you could have a coffin in green white green and have a letter written on it, abi wetin you think?


ah, expired weetabix does the body and soul lots of good, you didn't know? Think about it. Half the things we ate in Naija were expired by the time they got to your table.I remember one woman trying to sell me Hi-5 (or is that the name of those juice-box concoctions?). The thing had expired over a year and she told me it was fine that she drinks it all the time.


How you doing?

OluwaDee said...

In Feb I took expired drugs, n I don't think it had any adverse effect on me.

How body?

aloted said...

i was going to say exactly the same thing Rita said...about best before or expiry date

kai i also nearly believed that UK govt gist - awoof abi..i was like how come i haven't received mine

only coincidence i can think of now is i dating two guys (at different times :P) with the same name and you wont believe, my husband's middle name is that dreadful name (lol..sorry i consider it dreadful) and he is threatening to name our first child the dreadful name!

Anonymous said...

@ssd: i think what u were trying to say is 5alive :p

The ringtone thing is just a coincidence joo, u dramatic so and so. even tho i have you to thank for my new found knowledge of what a cereal bowl is

Vera Ezimora said...

lol @ Badderchic. E no go better 4 u. You said my one & only Naijaleta should paint his coffin green white green?? lol.

Naijaleta, don't mind all these people wishing you eternal rest. E no go betta 4 them. In fact, just to prove how sure I am that nothing will happen to you, I will go and look for expired cereal and eat it too. Bumight will not need 2 take care of me @ alllll.

LOL @ the government replacing phones in UK. I for don pack my kaya move into UK oh. Why shall I shy?

lol @ Aloofar.

Shubby Doo said...

Good 2 have u back trouble

Afrobabe said...

lol @ the phone disclaimer...u no want receive letters from naija??

hmmm spooky thing..I once met a guy who was thinking about shagging me while I was thinking the same thing...spooky innit???

Afrobabe said...

On another occasion I met a guy who tot I looke great...funny thing was i also tot so...sooooooooo spooky...


Unkulu, bring yaself to!


Hey you, go check out and leave your thoughts on squashing and fatsploitation.

I'm curious to know what you boys think, hahahaha


@ my sista, thank you. You are so right. hahaha

Wetin be Hi5 self?



Hope all is well.

shalewa said...

e better as u no die jare.imagine blogsville without naijaleta.but if u were to die from d expired food,u wud still end up in heaven cuz u wud hav nuf time to make peace with its all good either way.abi?